Tuesday, November 13, 2007

House hunting and rivals.

The three blondes are a little angry that they have been demoted since I wished back my mate Vendetta. Not like I care.

Well this next challenge is good news for me. Damned tree house was giving me fleas. I announce to evreyone that we are going to leave. And Tarzan bounds up happily. " This mean Cain leave Tarzan’s home? That Tarzan free?"

" Sure right." I smirk. Before blasting that vermin hatchery he calls a home. As for your jungle well FINAL FLASH!" I set the canopy a blaze then I told Tarzan " "My grandfather used your loved ones as target practice. So enjoy your freedom for what it's worth."

Vendetta smirks. " And get your self a job so you can get a bath and some clothes weirdo." She was dragging the Black Widow and smacked Tarzan over the head with her body. " How cozy. We're getting a new place looks like someone is finally ready for commitment. "

I roll my eyes. "Let's go to Luthor's house of evil realty ."

You know Lex sent me this freak as a realtor.

Tch! Next time he wants some assassins for his next attack against Superman, he's getting The KF Clown, and a bunch of cannon fodder. No Elite.

Mad Dog points and laughs, while the Clown Says " He looks like Ken Doll."

Alpha rolls his eyes. " I should have stayed retired. "

The Creature protests. " I can do anything you dorks can do even better he stares at Vendetta " Want me to show you babe?" She is not amused.

First he teleports to Eternia, Skeletor was trying to sale Snake Mountain. Seems HE-Man appears drunk and beats them all at random times of the day in fact did so at that point.

I'm sorry but a drunken half naked man running in at random intervals, is not what I want. Even though Mandy ,Sandy and Candy begged me to buy it I refused. The next place we went to was the old Legion of Doom's HQ.

" This is great. Why did the LOD abandon this place?" I question.

" No reason." He lies.

" You know pal I read body language and your hiding something tell me or die!"

" The swamp is infested with um Tentacle Monsters."

So after I destroy the swamp and kill the elf I decide to buy one of Arcade's old Murder Worlds and remake it in my image. Yes I'm in an Amusement park of death, and I love every minute. Next was the final part of the challenge lure an Arch rival here.

Unlike most people here, I was born with a nemesis. I turn on a time beacon. A device that sends a signal across the time stream. Soon she'll be here looking for me.

It didn’t take long as soon as it became dark she appeared outside in the Cannon Fodder. Tea cup section she fought her way through them easily. I announce over the PA system " Welcome Batwoman of the Future. This park has different sections all built towards my Henchmen's taste.

First of you are now in the Cannon Fodder teacup ride of doom. I push a button and adamantuium blades fly towards her. Cutting into her skin she blows then up with some explosive Batrangs. Ah not using your powers huh?

She wanders to the next section. No doubt sensing my ki, this part is the KF Clown' s Circus O' Death. Clown bots, and circus performer androids along with mutated animals maul and her The she has to start blasting them with her abilities King Fu Clown Jumps her, And freaks her out with the alien fox thing he picked up on Etrenia.

She defeats the clown and his sick fetishes pretty quickly. Alpha's Gun Fu Dojo Was but an obstacle, but all the Adamantium bullets him and his Army of androids fired at her slowed her down some. Only through her speed did she avoid getting something vital hit.

Sandy Mandy And candy’s Pink Dream House of terror weakened her with evil dolls and the blondes them selves. Got lucky and hit her with a poison gas before Batsy defeated them.

Her metabolism Barley had the time to fight off the toxin when she Stumbles into Mad dog's Kennel Yes exactly like it sounds Batwoman had to battle her way through genetically altered werewolves and Mad Dog him self.

She finally blasted her way into my area. " Gotham Bruce you recreated New Gotham?" Batsie asks to the camera.

"Schway isn’t it?" I ask over the Intercom. Schway is means cool in the future it’s never mind. I laugh as she battles her way through Synthoid Jokerz and people who genetically engineered themselves to be half Animals or as we call them "Splicers."

She finally climbs her way up to the replica of Wayne Tower. Where Evil Ryu awaits Though I don't get why she didn't fly I guess she's too hurt, She and Ryu Has a fight that was similar to mine. And Ryu gets a surprise when the gold aura forms around her and she defeats him with her super strength.

Finally she finds me in the inner chamber. It looks like an old Japanese throne room, but I've installed High tech dimensional portals into the walls so I can go where ever I need to just by walking through.

" Bruce we don't have to do this. " She whines.

" Come now. You know you've always wanted to see which one of us was better .. Sister. " I reveal that I'm ready for battle.

" Fine Bruce but I'm Fighting you as Barbra , Not Batwoman." She takes off her mask. " But one way or another your coming back to our time. "

" What about me Babs?" Vendetta jumps out from behind an Oriental paper divider.
" Bruce? She's alive what did you do?"

This is the distraction I need. I blast Big Sis through one of portal windows and I turn it off, leaving her stranded . That's one throne in my side gone.

" So Bruce where did you send her ?" Vendetta asks. " Somewhere where she'll die?

I laugh. " No. But she'll wish she were dead. "

Let's take a look at where I sent her.

" Again! Again!" the horrible creatures of that reality shout.

" Bruce let me out! Let me out!" Sis screams. I can't stand to see her suffering. So I turn the portal off and watch a movie with Vendetta.


captain koma said...

You are a mean and twisted man Brucie.

That is cruel and inhuman punishment.

You just might win this.

Dr. Nemonok said...

Ah so you're related to the Batman, so that is your deep dark secret that I had already figured out.

Deadpool said...

Good start brother.

I like what you're doing trying to get a secret lair by using someone else's.

Nightwing said...

No offence, but YOU SUCK!

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Sent to the land of Tellitubbies. that is a fate worse then death. but I am willing to make a trip to here batcave if needed.

Bruce Cain said...

Koma : thanks.

Dr Nemonok: Not by choice, or by blood. He just had to adopt my mom.

Deadpool: thanks.

Nightwing: Heh.

AOC: That's my sister!

Gyrobo said...

More proof that teletubbies' stomachs are Phantom Zone monitors.